Date: Sun, 05 Jan 1997 01:32:18 -0800
From: (Laura Werner)
Subject: Laura's latest First

A few of you might have noticed that I haven't written any "My First ..." posts in some time. Now that I've been in the scene for a while, I'm just not having as many new, first-time experiences. But I had one last week while I was visiting Rosy.

We were doing a spanking and paddling scene on the floor in front of the fireplace. I topped Rosy first, and then after a bit of recovery time it was her turn for revenge. The scene started out fairly normally. First there was some hand spanking, then my small leather paddle, and then other, more painful implements, with another layer of clothing removed every now and then.

After I was well tenderized, Rosy spanked me for a while with the cherry paddle I gave her on my last visit, and it started to really hurt. She then said that she'd spank me until I told her that I was ready for ten more hard ones from that cherry paddle. She whacked me with various other implements, including the dreaded Air Vinyl, for a little while, and then I wimped out and asked for those last ten.

Wow. Those last ten swats must have been nearly as hard as Rosy could swing the paddle, because they _hurt_. They hurt so badly, in fact, that I started crying from the pain. Sobbing, even. That's right. Even though I keep chiming in on the "Pain alone won't make me cry" side whenever we talk about crying, that actually happened to me. It was a bit scary at first, but as soon as I got used to the idea it was ok. Extremely painful, but ok.

I'm still not sure if pain _alone_ could do it though. This time the pain was definitely the what got my crying started, and it was what I kept crying about rather than switching over into a more general emotional catharsis. But without the emotional openness and vulnerability that I've developed over the last six months or so, I'm not sure I would have been free enough with my tears even under all that pain.

who will have another very large first under her belt in 2 weeks.